Oh I Wish I Were

Oh I Wish I Were
Words by Mandy
Sung to the tune of the Oscar Myer Wiener song

Oh I wish I were a brave fire-fighter
Yes that is what I’d really like to be
And if I were a brave fire-fighter
I’d rescue all the cats stuck in a tree

Oh I wish I were an organic farmer
Yes that is what I’d really like to be
And if I were an organic farmer
I’d plant carrots and turnips next to peas

Oh I wish I were a math and physics teacher
Yes that is what I’d really like to be
And if I were a math and physics teacher
I’d know the square root of infinity

Oh I wish I were call center agent
Yes that is what I’d really like to be
But if I were a call center agent
Everyone would say “don’t bother me”

Oh I wish I were a veterinary doctor
Yes that is what I’d really like to be
And if I were a veterinary doctor
I’d clean up lots cat and puppy pee

Oh I wish I lived in Banff or maybe Whistler
Yes that is where I’d really like to be
And if I lived in Banff or maybe Whistler
In all my spare time I could go and ski

Oh I wish I were a professor of religion
Yes that is what I’d really like to be
And if I were a professor of religion
I’d know the meaning of infinity

Oh I wish I were an Olympic Bingo player
Yes that is what I’d really like to be
And if I were an Olympic Bingo player
I’d win the gold with O 63.

This is a song I enjoy singing to Abigail. It is inspired, no? Can you guess my inspirations?
It is intentionally tongue in cheek and not meant to offend anyone.
I welcome additional verses in the spirit of the song. Can you do better than I have?